thanks giving, revisited

with thanks to Mary Engelbreit

We had a beautiful holiday celebration Thursday at my sister N's house. It is a lovely home, nestled in the hills on the coast, and is my favorite place for family parties. N. and my brother in law G. are wonderful hosts, as is my niece G, and it was a delight to be there. There were nine of us at table, with Mom and Dad, A&J, Anna and me. We had all the usual plates on the table, the Great Bird, sweet potatoes, salad, cranberries... and some less typical dishes like cheesy polenta, spinach soufflé and quinoa. Of course I ate too much... especially considering that I was just getting over some stomach troubles (after Tuesday's lunch mishap) and I was punished for my gluttony by having to leave early. Alas.

N. asked us to do something that I cannot, in my fifty thanksgivings, remember ever doing with my family: we went around the table and said what we were thankful for. We toasted safe travel, good health, togetherness, the members of our family who were not there, our President Elect and Native Americans. But I was... shy. I did not speak to all that I am thankful for. It is not too late. Here is a short list, a few things for which I am grateful to God:

My children, who are strong and loving and thriving. The health and longevity of my parents. My siblings and their families, and the love that we share. My greater family - grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles - and the way they have shaped me and loved me through the years. The individual strangers who have blessed my life by becoming my friend. My once-in-a-lifetime friend. The preachers and teachers and sages who have guided me along my path. Crisp autumnal days and long nights. The ability to pay my bills, again, this month. Trees - the ones that turn color and shed their leaves, and those that don't. The opportunity to bring beauty to others in many forms. Rain. Apples. Cinnamon. Flowers - growing in my garden, or cut and arranged on the table. The wireless connection that suddenly appeared on my computer a week or two ago (and I do wish it would come back!) Singing. Feeling Christmassy. The anticipation of a challenge and opportunity for growth in a creative field. Beauty in all things!

Thanksgiving Day

I wanted to post something wonderful yesterday... didn't, mostly because what I wanted to post is not possible for me to achieve. There is a beautiful song, sung and written by John McCutcheon, that is perfect for this season. Sadly, it seems there is no video version anywhere on the web and I don't know how to post an audio file here. Have a listen, here.

All that to say, here's a beautiful song poem offering for the season...

Thanksgiving Day
words and music by John McCutcheon & Si Kahn

Thankful for the food, thankful for the company
Thankful for the things that we do and say
Thankful for the friends, thankful for the family
Glad to be together on Thanksgiving Day

On the edge of season here in late November
Autumn nearly over and Winter in the air
We have good reason to pause and remember
The blessings that we share...

Let us remember those gone before us
The ones with the brain and the strength and the might
Showed us the way, laid it before us
Turned the darkness into light...

Thankful for the food, thankful for the company
Thankful for the things that we do and say
Thankful for the friends, thankful for the family
Glad to be together on Thanksgiving Day

Let us imagine those still in waiting
The ones who look so open-eyed
Those who'll one day rise before us
Strong and proud, prepared to guide...

May the ways that we treat others
Be the measure of our worth
May our memory be a blessing
On the future of this earth...

Thankful for the food, thankful for the company
Thankful for the things that we do and say
Thankful for the friends, thankful for the family
Glad to be together on Thanksgiving Day

Linda Marie Sprouse

There is something weird about my brain that allows me to remember almost nothing important, but I can remember with great accuracy the birthdays of any friend I made in my teens and 20's. For instance, I totally missed Anna's birthday, which according to my calendar was the 10th this month. (Sorry Anna!!) But I remembered that my old high school crush Jim Kraywinkel's birthday was on the 15th, and Paula's boyfriend Scott McCurdy's birthday is tomorrow.

My friend Sprouse would have been 53 years old today if things had been different.

I met her where I meet almost all of my friends, in choir. We were all in Skyline college choir together - it is where the Schleptet (except for Bill, who came from Cañada college) had its origin. Linda had a beautiful soprano voice (she'd probably say mezzo, but Lord, could she hit those high notes!), and she could sing anything. She could also do anything.

She loved all sports, played a mean softball game, cussed and drank like a sailor. She loved cars - my only girlfriend who could speak "car" - and drove this scary Plymouth land-yacht at what we shall call excessive speeds, with questionable brakes. (One of the scariest rides I ever had was in that car. All the way up to Novato she drove like a bat out of hell, and then stepped out of the car in Elizabethan costume and sang madrigals like an angel.) She loved the Matterhorn and Space Mountain at Disneyland, and no one could spin a teacup - or enjoy it more - than she could. She was a master of sarcasm, with a razor-sharp wit. She had questionable (very) taste in movies. She loved her family and her friends furiously. She called my babies "rug rats" and "ankle biters", pretended to loathe children, and loved them with abandon.

She was only 26 when we learned that she was sick. It was serious, but she approached her illness (I am certain, with the tremendous support of her family) with the same tough attitude she used on everything in her life. She found her way to some excellent doctors. She found a way to avoid dialysis for years. She did not let her illness define her: she went back to school and earned her master's degree in voice. She found meaningful work as music director at her church. When she found her beloved Shadow, (a giant black dog with a pedigree I cannot now recall) they went to work together as Shadow trained to be a therapy dog.

Sprouse was a powerhouse, but did not do this alone. There were hundreds of things that a normal human would not have survived, but by her side for every surgery, every painful procedure, every new diagnosis was her mother Jean. They were a dynamic duo, and if Linda was around, Jean was not far behind - simultaneously cracking the proverbial whip and watching protectively over her daughter. It was Jean's death five years ago that provided an exit for Linda. She lived just five days after her mother. I suspect they were both relieved by then, but we are the poorer for their loss.

I miss her. I miss the look of mischief in her eye when she is about to take a song at a ridiculous tempo. I miss her cackle. I miss the sarcastic "and have a great day" at the end of their answering machine message. I miss... her.

At their memorial service, Linda's old choir from the Methodist church and her new choir in the Presbyterian church combined to sing together. It was a mighty group. Her Schleptet companions - Bill, Todd, Paul, Dave and I - sat together in the pews, too stunned with grief to sing. (Rob, Jolie and Carolyn, who all live out of state, sent their parents to represent.) Before the service, I pulled out my 1985 tape that we made one night in Bill's living room after Christmas caroling for hours in the cold. We all listened to Sprouse's glorious solo in "Mary Had A Baby". Thus, she sang at her own memorial - I am certain she would have approved.

Rest in peace, my dear friend.

food safety rule #19

If your turkey sandwich has been left at room temperature for over 8 hours, do not (note to self: Do Not) throw it in the fridge anyway, bring it back to work the next day, allow it to come back to room temperature and then eat it.

For you will pay mightily for this transgression.

blessings

It seems like everything's been breaking lately. I spilled some water (and a little soil) from a houseplant into my keyboard the other day killing the space bar, tab key and the command key for cutting and pasting. (Do.you.have.any.idea.how.difficult.it.is.to.type.without.
a.space.bar?) They turned off the water in my building last week, and after it was back on and I flushed the toilet, there was a mighty explosion in the pipes - and the toilet has not been the same since. I'll spare you more examples of broken stuff, but trust me, it's been a little weird.

So it was no surprise, really, when I turned into the Trader Joe's parking lot this evening with my brakes making a grinding noise that would scare any sensible woman. It came on suddenly, though not totally out of the blue, (the car has been shaking when I use the brakes at speeds over 40 mph, for about six months.) Darn it, I just wanted to grab a couple of things at the store and get home to dinner... maybe do a load or three of laundry... and now this. I called A., and it turns out that he was at Mom's, about to have dinner before a band rehearsal. He came right down, drove the car around the parking lot once, and said yep, we've gotta fix that.

He followed me home as I drove the back streets to the homestead. Oddly, there was no grinding nor squealing the whole way there! Mom set an extra place at the table for me (dinner was yummy.) A. set to work on my car right after dinner, bless him, and did not get to his rehearsal (long planned with great difficulty). Dad observed and advised, made phone calls to Kragen's for parts. 'Round about 8:30 or 9, I was getting pretty fed up and antsy, ready to be HOME, thankyouverymuch. I decided to take a walk, and called T. while I went up the hill to go a couple of laps around the high school track.

As I recounted my evening to T, my impatience and annoyance melted away. Here I am, driving an 8 year old car with 97K miles on it. The only thing I've ever had to do to it is replace one set of tires, one battery, and one set of brakes. What a good car. The brakes did not give way until I was safely on El Camino ready to pull into a parking lot, after driving in heavy traffic for nearly an hour. A. was just THREE miles away, not 35 miles away at his house. And he knew how to fix my car in one short evening. I got a free meal, and got to share time with my family. I have a son and father who love me and stopped everything they were doing tonight, to make sure I had a car to drive. I have a mother who waited patiently with me, and a daughter who commiserated with me. I have a dear friend who let me talk it all out.

Talk about blessings. Wow. I'm rich.

ithinkikilledmykeyboard

ispilledsomewateronitwhilemovingaplant,andnowthespacebardoesn'twork
andneitherdoestheshfitkey.

9earlier,theshiftkeywasstuck'on',andthatwasn'tsogreateither.0

perfect

delicious moments from the past week:

• singing barbershop with double quartets
• clean windows for the first time in six months
• crisp, sunny days and cool clear nights
  
• compliments from a doctor I worked with last week
  
• hearing live Debussy, up close and personal (and all the way to the end)
  
• seeing a friend who has been sad lately, laughing
  
• the gift of a bag of chocolate covered pretzels
• getting out for a long, leisurely breakfast
• watching President-elect Obama and Mrs. Obama hold hands while they charmed my socks off in the 60 minutes interview
• being told "I love you"

beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep

This here is a test.

It is only a test.

If this had been an actual blog post, you would have been instructed to read it with a grain of salt and your cheek imbedded with your own tongue. Please disregard any previous tests, and forget that you ever read this one.

We now return to our regular programming.